LIVING A HAPPY AND FULL LIFE DESPITE LIVING WITH CHRONIC PAIN
It is strange how long it can take us to realise our good fortune.
I reached my forties before I was able to qualify the difference between contentment and happiness, and possibly the paths to attain each.
Let’s just agree that happiness is that fleeting wondrous moment upon the safe arrival of a beloved child, that a son has returned home from a dangerous mission unharmed, or has found his true love.
Contentment on the other hand, can be life long, if only we allow it to enter our consciousness.
At the age of eight my father introduced me to the deepest and most complete love of music, specifically to opera and learning easily at that age, through my presence at many rehearsals and performances (in English) these stories, words and melodies were imprinted firmly on my mind to set it free years later, as I escaped pain by putting my mind straight into an imagined day at the opera. What a heritage I had been blessed to have! This brought me lasting contentment. It always does.
So many good people came into my life, from various fields, not only musicians and singers butscientists, doctors, nurses, teachers and those who unknowingly, taught me life’s lesson that to smile at something or to conceive the notion that ‘one day’ some disaster might turn out to be really funny, whilst others would have to find their place in the safety box of my ‘forgettery’ or to know when to grieve and to accept.
We all meet good people – but how do we recognise them? Usually there is something in a voice or particularly in the eyes which draws us to trust, betimes falsely, but with instinct and above all belief in a higher being – a Universal force of Good against Evil – thus was I trained by a unique mentor whose story I reveal in my first book BELONGING – a memoir.
Whilst working on BELONGING, I knew there was something far more important to write which was born from its message of survival - which could transfer- I hoped- to help others. This is the book PAIN MANAGEMENT which took six challenging years of interviewing some hundredfamilies from three countries, learning how Pain affected the entire community and how Pain was managed by each group. Unsurprisingly, most participants found comfort in each other and by drawing unto themselves a circle of trusted friends, in whom they could unfailingly rely for support in times good and bad.
It takes time to develop and know a great friend, although sometimes, in the twinkling of an eye, we just know when a person will be that companion for as long as we need each other, maybe for a lifetime.
In managing pain, be it emotional or physical, first we need the correct diagnosis, a team of medical specialists with expertise in each field, then a group of friends within the community who will hold the family together to laugh with us when possible and to cry with us if that is the appropriate thing to do.
Once our pain is diagnosed, a treatment plan arranged, only then can we begin to develop strategies to find our answers by changing the focus away from ourselves through helping others whenever the opportunity arises.
But that is only the beginning….
Please contact Wisewomensworld to purchase a copy of Renee's excellent book or you can find it in Book stores
© Renee Goossens 2008
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